Today is the big day. Taylor Swift is coming to town for a concert. I’ll be there, working.
Here is a list of things I know about Ms. Swift:
The Jolie’s adventures continue with a trip to LA. Since we last saw her in California, she thought that meant Los Angeles. She was very happy to find herself in Louisiana in time for Mardi Gras! Her host for this visit is long time Blurt reader, Jane. Jane offered to have the Jolie down for Mardi Gras last year, but schedules didn’t really line up. Thank you to Jane for sticking with us and having her stop by this year!
That didn’t get in the way of a good party, though. In keeping with her celebrity status, the Muses decided to include her in their official ride through the city.
Wednesday, February 15, a.m.
“I need to cross the bayou to get to headquarters.”
“These huge geese are nothing compared to nesting gators. How can I get across?”
“I can use one of the stunts from my movies to leap this bayou.”
The Jolie took a little rest after her Key West trip. Soon, she grew restless and wanted to get on the road. She asked me if she could go out west again, since she loved Key West so much. I didn’t have the endurance to get into a geography discussion with her, so I just sent her to California to visit Linlah.
Linlah, unlike me, has infinite endurance, or at least enough to get the photos of The Jolie’s adventures and allow her to dictate her thoughts to her.
After being cooped up in that “if it fits it ships” box for a week all I could think of was I gotta find something to climb. Lucky for me Linlah lives near a park that afforded some great climbing opportunities.
They say she was there when the building went up. She moved over to the new one when they knocked the old one down. When our division moved from that new building to a satellite office, she moved in to that building. I guess that means that I have first hand knowledge that she was there when the last two buildings went up. I’m going to take it on faith that she was there when they constructed the one that got knocked down.
Let’s call her Gail, since that’s not her name. She’s the secretary for our little slice of the big operation. Read the rest of this entry »
2011 was The Jolie’s first full year of travel. Wow, has she ever traveled. She’s been to the Arctic, she’s been to the Caribbean, and a bunch of places in between. Let’s review, shall we?
The Jolie ended 2010 and started 2011 in my home state of Maryland. She was in Baltimore as a guest of Wendi, whose food blog, Bon Appetit Hon, is a regular stop of mine.
Anyone who hosts The Jolie is a risk taker, Wendi proved she was no exception to the rule. Bringing The Jolie to work is always risky. She played Godzilla with a building model.
The Jolie tried to escape from Wendi by hiding in a beer stein.
Not long ago, I wrote of the folly of having oneself frozen. In the more distant past, I have written of the alien we call Larry King. Last week, Larry King revealed that he wanted to be frozen and brought back when medical science could cure whatever ails him.
I can’t ignore that.
Larry King: Alien
I have no scientific proof, but I am fairly certain that Larry King is from another planet. Look at him. Big triangular head. Wide, wrinkled forehead. Whenever you see a drawing of an alien, does it not have a triangular head with a big wrinkly forehead? Ipso facto, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, Larry King is an alien.
The Jolie landed at my house just as I was about to head off on a trip that would include a celebration of my fiftieth birthday. I opened her envelope and she asked if I had a ticket for her. I told her she was welcome to come along if she didn’t stir up trouble. She looked at me and asked “what could go wrong?”
Yeah. So we headed off to the airport with that question ringing in my ear. Later that day, we found ourselves sitting on the runway in Atlanta. Waiting…waiting…waiting. Finally, the pilot explained that we were waiting for the caterers to arrive and stock the plane. The Jolie was thrilled! She started calling out an order. I had to tell her that we weren’t in the section that got to place an order. She was shocked.
Thirty minutes later the caterer arrived. The Jolie stood in the window, screaming at them…
…”thirty minutes late and all I’m getting is peanuts?!?! PEANUTS?!?!?!
But soon, The Jolie was on the ground in The Conch Republic at Key West International Airport.
The Jolie and I headed to Schooner Wharf. Schooner Wharf is one of my favorite bars in the world. It is open air, right on the water and laid back…I don’t need much more than this. The Jolie fought me for me for some of my jerk chicken sandwich. My friends wanted to know who this little jerk was.
I figured The Jolie would start pushing people’s buttons but didn’t anticipate that it would be so soon in the trip. I figured I’d better get her away from people and get her to calm down. I decided to go for a little tour of some island spots that my friends had already seen.
Mile Marker Zero on Route 1 symbolizes the end of the road. Sure, there is more road behind mile zero. Like I said, it is symbolic. The Jolie didn’t want to miss the chance to have her picture taken at Mile Zero.
The Jolie has become very popular. This may be due to the fact that so few people have actually met her. Bit by bit she is making her way around the continent and the world, and showing people that her Mona Lisa smile hides a troublesome personality.
Sara has been one of the many people patiently waiting for a visit from the blessed one and finally, she got what she wished for. Once again, people should be careful about that wishing thing.
“Ding dong” “Who’s there?” The Jolie has arrived to Detroit on a beautiful fall day!