Five Routine Minutes: What Does Replace Mean?
Posted: May 17, 2013 Filed under: Foolishness | Tags: art, break room, drawing, humor, Microwave, postaweek, Toaster, work 18 Comments »Most days I bring my lunch to work. I’ve usually got some leftovers in my lunch bag. A quick spin in the office microwave and I’m in business.
There’s always something good on the break room TV. A few weeks ago, we watched some guy who was trying to understand why some lions attacked him. I thought the buckets of raw meat he was carrying were a bigger factor than the “experts” seemed to. Last Friday, we watched some bumpkins wrestling catfish in muddy water. That show made the catfish look like sympathetic characters.
Matisse’s Mom Might Disagree
Posted: May 11, 2013 Filed under: Getting older | Tags: Antiques Roadshow, art, family, Henri Matisse, humor, mothers day, Pablo Picasso 18 Comments »It seemed to me that I ought to write something for Mothers Day, but that wasn’t going so well.
I took a break from being frustrated and remembered, mid-break, that I ought to call my Mom and let her know when I would stop by for a Mother’s Day visit. We talked about our days, and then she remembered that she had something she wanted to talk to me about.
On the way in to where she’d left herself a note, she asked if I’d ever seen Antiques Roadshow. I told her I had, but not today. “Someone was on with what looked like pencil drawings, but they were done by Picasso and …oh here’s my note…Picasso and Matisse. You know about them, right?” Read the rest of this entry »
Art Criticism: An Articulate Lion
Posted: May 2, 2013 Filed under: Art Criticism | Tags: art, Art criticism, comedy, humor, Lion, painting, postaweek, tokyo ska paradise orchestra 23 Comments »We all know the lion as “The King Of The Jungle”. The lions might have trademarked that phrase because none of the other animals seem to challenge the issue. Trademark or not, we accept it because we’ve heard it again and again. I’ve always thought it was a pretentious title.
Besides, the jungle holds more than one lion, but there can be only one king. The fact that there are so many “kings” probably contributes to the jungle being a poorly organized place.
And all lions get the “King Of The Jungle” title. It doesn’t matter if it applies to them or not. A lion who lives in a zoo is likely the king of his enclosure, but it would be hard for that cat to argue he has any influence over jungle affairs. It hardly seems fair that a kept lion bears the same title as a working lion.
Today’s art critique has nothing to do with jungle monarchy. It delves into the realm of animal art because it is a painting of a lion. Read the rest of this entry »
Five Routine Minutes: An Owl’s Job
Posted: April 24, 2013 Filed under: Five Minutes | Tags: art, comedy, drawings, humor, Humour, Owl, postaweek 27 Comments »An owl keeps hanging around outside my window.
Five Routine Minutes: A Long Distance Call
Posted: March 18, 2013 Filed under: Five Minutes | Tags: art, drawing, family, humor, life, line drawing, postaweek 36 Comments » A little background on this one. While I was in college, my family moved away. I wrote about the sordid details here. You should go look, I’ll wait. Welcome back. My mother and I had a conversation last week about my life in Maryland after the family had moved on to North Carolina. This was one of the stories I told her.During the last year and a half of my time in college, I lived with a family who had a home a few miles from campus. They had a spare bedroom for rent. The university matched us up and it worked for both sides. Steve, Claire and their kids were very good to me.
They were really nice people.
This was in the early eighties, so there are a couple of things that are important to know. I shared the house phone, which was in the kitchen. This was in the pre-cell phone era, so I’d talk to my parents once a week or so. Long distance calls were expensive. I couldn’t afford many of them if I wanted to pay for things like school, rent, food and dates.
Also, I had a mustache. My mustache has nothing to do with the story. But, as a visual artist, I know that you’ll see the difference in how I portray myself in this post.
During this time, my grandfather was very ill. His time was short. I’d been to visit him and was back in school for about two weeks. My routine was back to normal, but grandpa and my mom were on my mind.
One morning, I slept in later than usual. There were no classes on my schedule until close to lunch time and I’d worked late the night before. The phone rang in the kitchen.
Claire answered it. I could hear her talking as I dozed. Then she called up the stairs – “Oma, your mom’s on the phone. Are you up?” My mind started racing as soon as she said it was my mom.
There was no doubt what this call was. I jumped out of bed, put on my glasses and zipped down stairs.
Claire knew about my grandfather’s condition. She handed me the phone, touched my arm and mouthed, “I’m sorry”. But when she did it, she had the oddest look on her face. It was almost like she was stifling a laugh.
I stood in the kitchen and consoled my mother over the phone. We discussed arrangements, then I went upstairs to take a shower. By the time I came back down, Claire had taken another call from my family and gotten my flight arrangements. She even offered to drop me off at the airport.
On the way to the airport, I had a disturbing realization. I was asleep when the phone rang. Claire called me and I jumped out of bed. There was something missing in that sequence. There was only one way to clear up my concern.
Was I wearing pants?
This horrified me. I offered to move out. Claire would have none of that. She told me she knew I would never have stood around in the kitchen in jockey shorts on purpose. When I came back home, she and Steve both went out of their way to make me feel welcome.
They also got in their share of jokes until the day I graduated.
Five Routine Minutes: My Dad And A Hard Working Five Year Old
Posted: February 20, 2013 Filed under: Five Minutes | Tags: art, comedy, drawings, humor, North Carolina State University, postaweek, stick figure 22 Comments »On Sunday, I took my parents to North Carolina State University. We went to see my son play with the school’s Pep Band at a women’s basketball game.
Here is a picture I drew of my folks and the Omawari-son after the game.
How do you accessorize a breast cancer awareness t-shirt?
Yes, I know it isn’t my usual caliber of work. Even Picasso had a bad day now and again.
After we had dinner, we were on the way to drop my son off at his dorm. He pointed out a favorite restaurant of his. It is a Korean place that I’ve written a “Five Minutes” post about before. The conversation reminded my Dad of an encounter he had with the owner of a shoe repair business, a Korean gentleman. Read the rest of this entry »
Five Routine Minutes: If I Knew, I’d Have Waited
Posted: February 13, 2013 Filed under: Five Minutes | Tags: art, cartoons, cleaning crew, comedy, drawing, humor, postaweek, work 32 Comments »A nice couple cleans the office where I work.
Our staff is in and out of the place around the clock, every day. One hundred people who work in the field tend to track a lot of that field back into the office. These two keep the place up and are very nice about it in the process. Read the rest of this entry »
Art Criticism: Our Earliest Mammalian Ancestor
Posted: February 11, 2013 Filed under: Art Criticism | Tags: art, art critique, comedy, humor, Mammal, news, painting, science 42 Comments »Big news last week – scientists have developed a concept of what the earliest mammal looked like.
Finding out what the earliest mammal looked like is critical. That animal had a lot of responsibility. It is the ancestor to elephants, cats, dogs, monkeys, monkeys who ride dogs, even humans.
Imagine what we could learn from an animal that could handle that responsibility. I am the ancestor to one person and the pressure…my God, the pressure! If I multiply that pressure by billions of species and billions of individuals of each of those species, I get an animal that must have been superb. The scientists didn’t come up with superb.




People that have blurted back