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The Policies Of My Administration: Here We Grow Again

Long ago, a business person decided to expand the building he operated from. Concerned that construction equipment in the parking lot would make customers think he’d closed the business during remodeling, he put out a sign. The sign said “Here We Grow Again! Open During Construction”.

I don’t like quotation mark abuse either. (image via liverightnowonline.com)

His partner arrived shortly after the sign was hung. She said “Ha, I see what you did. Play on words. Yes.”  The words carried no hint of enthusiasm, but they were enough. Since that day, entrepreneurs have put out that clever “here we grow again” sign when they expand or for new construction.

My Administration Will Value Words

Words are tools that convey messages of importance and humor. Sometimes, humor joins with importance to help both be more effective. The humor/importance interface is what the “grow again” crowd is aiming for. Because they don’t effectively use the tools we call words, they never hit the mark they’re aiming for.

Substituting grow for the word go looks like a clever play on words to those who put up these signs. It isn’t to the rest of us.

I am aware that I am taking the liberty of speaking for you. Yes, I am saying that you, dear reader, do not think “here we grow again” is clever. You’re brighter than that. You’re also bright enough to know that if you plan on being one of the cool kids when I am running the show, this is something you’ll have to recognize that I will be speaking on your behalf on.

So, it is resolved that none of the cool people think the “here we grow” crowd is as clever or funny as we are. The question that remains is how my administration will deal with those who insist upon putting that sign in front of their places.

Say Hello To My Friend, Dynamite

Even cone factories will be subject to the policy. (image via wikipedia)

My administration will bring swift, decisive action against any establishment that hangs the forbidden sign.

Implosion. Hang the forbidden sign, your building comes down.

Once a few buildings go down because their owners consider themselves clever wordsmiths, none of us will have to endure “here we grow again” signs.

Kaboom, problem solved.

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27 Comments on “The Policies Of My Administration: Here We Grow Again”

  1. Laura says:

    If the McDonald’s is new, how is it that they’re growing again?

  2. Wendy says:

    This the department for me! A well-crafted pun is a thing of beauty, but a poor one is almost physically painful. My resume will be arriving shortly.

    • omawarisan says:

      I’m sure I will hire you.

      In the interest of full disclosure, you know how there’s all the secretaries in the us cabinet, and then the attorney general who is secretary level but gets a different title? People in my inner circle will be executive of whatever they’re in charge of. Except the person in charge of puns (you). That person will be the rapunzel- regardless of gender or hair length.

  3. If it said “Hair We Grow Again,” that’d be different. For me at least.

  4. shoutabyss says:

    I once ridiculed that phrase, too. Twix! Great minds! Oops, didn’t mean to insult you.

    Anyway, you’ve got my vote. You’re in the non-partisan section on the back of the ballot, right?

    Not to self-plug or anything, but here’s my take on the phrase. Here We Grow Again. I highly recommend no one click on this link. You’ve been warned.

  5. There is a fine line between clever and cheesy.

  6. Sigh. I’m in trouble.

  7. Debbie says:

    I can honestly say I’ve never hung that forbidden sign outside my premises. You’re so right — it’s tacky and cheesy. And dynamite sounds like an appropriate solution — you’ve got my vote, Oma!

  8. Kaboom. What makes your post even funnier is that the advertisement at the bottom depicts a pregnant woman. Kaboom, indeed.

  9. robincoyle says:

    HA! I read the sign as “Hair we grow again.”

  10. Yes. Here we “grow again.” Bigger butts and guts. Would you like a muffin top with that egg McMuffin? Thank you McD – bringing lard to every town is such an accomplishment.

  11. spencercourt says:

    I suspect the “we” is a reference to their customers’ waistlines.


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