The Jolie Pez Project: Maryland and Panama City, FLPosted: December 19, 2010
The Jolie’s latest visit was in Maryland and Florida with Thoughts Appear. This was a historic visit because it marked the first time anyone has risked air travel with the Jolie. Those who have met The Jolie know what a daring move that was. Imagine what could go wrong moving The Jolie through an airport checkpoint. Given the risk, I am surprised that this post did not end up coming to me from a prison email account.
Overall I had a wonderful time with The Jolie…once we established that I was the boss and Alpha Female. I discovered that The Jolie just needed a firm hand and a lot of discipline. Just one day after receiving The Jolie, I left Maryland to travel to Panama City Beach, Florida. She wasn’t too keen on being packed up again so soon, but she handled it pretty well.
The Jolie insisted on having her picture taken with the beautiful Gulf water behind her. I wasn’t too excited about her standing on the 6th floor balcony railing. I know she’s Lara Croft and would have some way to save herself, but I didn’t like the unnecessary risk.
Whenever The Jolie got lippy, I shoved her in my pocket – head first so she couldn’t enjoy the lovely beach scenery.
Whenever The Jolie gave me attitude, I punished her…by making her dig a hole to China.
I told The Jolie not to get to close to the water, but she insisted she would be fine.
After her ordeal, The Jolie stopped by Margaritaville for some refreshment.
The Jolie and her hostess then returned to Maryland, with plans to go into Washington, DC.. Bad weather kept them out of Washington, but the adventures went on…
Since I didn’t go into the District this weekend, I did my best to show The Jolie what she was missing by creating my own version of DC highlights.
The Jolie wasn’t pleased by my Toys for Tots donation. I think it was because the Barbie looked a little like Jennifer Aniston.
I was hoping to show The Jolie the dinosaur exhibit at the Natural History Museum, but I think my version is better because it incorporates my cat. My cat makes everything cooler. The cat eats the dinosaur who eats The Jolie. It illustrates the predator and prey relationship, and that’s educational.
When I was younger, I wanted to be a director, and since I was graced with the presence of The Jolie, I tried to live out my childhood dream by directing The Jolie.
“The T-Rex is chasing you! Run! Let me see terror! Pretend he’s a vicious beast who just ate your children. More terror, please! Didn’t you see Jurassic Park?”
She wasn’t having any of it.
The Jolie also got to experience my version of the big red shoe in Union Station. (My shoe was better because it wasn’t being guarded by police. I suspect the real shoe is a monument of some kind. A tribute to a First Lady’s shoe perhaps?)
After showing The Jolie the DC sites, I thought, “Why stop with DC? Let me take her on an African safari and to Paris, too!”
My thanks to Thoughts Appear for having The Jolie come by her place and for risking crossing state lines with her. This adventure, like all The Jolie’s travels, will be easy to find on The Jolie Pez Project home page and the Travels Of The Jolie Map.
And now The Jolie is on the road again, next stop – Baltimore, Hon!